In Pursuit of Happiness: No Stereotypical Abusers or Victims

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Updated: 6:58 PM Nov 20, 2008

In Pursuit of Happiness: No Stereotypical Abusers or Victims

Continuing Liz Hayes' special series, 'In Pursuit of Happiness,' about three women who've been abused, we explain that there are no stereotypical victims or abusers....but there are warning signs.

Posted: 4:22 PM Nov 20, 2008
Reporter: Liz Hayes
Email Address: lhayes@wsaw.com

In Pursuit of Happiness: No Stereotypical Abusers or Victims

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People stay in abusive relationships for many reasons. For some, it's all they've ever known. For others, circumstances make it nearly impossible to leave.

Continuing Liz Hayes' special series, 'In Pursuit of Happiness,' about three women who've been abused, we explain that there are no stereotypical victims or abusers....but there are warning signs.

Domestic violence revolves around power and control. The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence says abusers use intimidation and threats. They put down their partners and make them feel worthless and inferior.

They use the children against their partners, and they use isolation.

"It got to the point where he couldn't get to me so he got to my kids," said Davene who endured an entire lifetime of abuse.

'Erica' explains that using isolation is an important warning sign.

"The first two things you gotta notice is they take your friends and family away. People you have for support or who you can talk to. Somebody that you're gonna trust more than them."

Experts say abusers don't take responsibility for their actions. Instead, they put all the blame on the ones they hurt most.