Recent Domestic Violence in the Hmong community is sparking area leaders to change the culture of marriage.

In September of 2006, Chor Xiong murdered his wife, Padalina Thao and stabbed her boyfriend before he committed suicide.

Less than a year later, in August of 2007, Chor Thao stabbed his wife, Pa Houa Thao to death.

Saturday, April 12th, the Thao clan held a Hmong Couples Retreat to improve their reputation.

Local Hmong couples were invited for a day-long retreat. It was the first of its kind here in Marathon County.

As the date approached and I was anticipating what sort of story I'd be writing, I was also curious as to who would attend something like this? Would the word "retreat" attract young people? Would the "clan" invite draw in older couples? And of more than 4,000 Hmong community members in the county, how many would actually sacrifice part of their weekend to work on their relationship?

A day before the workshop and I heard the estimate was 50 couples.

That afternoon, more than 100 couples filled the Horace Mann Middle School cafeteria. A mix of young, middle-aged and older couples voluntarily participated in group and individual activities.

Husbands and Wives were encouraged to speak openly about their emotional, physical and mental needs.

In the seven hours my photographer and I were at the retreat, here's some things we learned:

True Thao, a counselor from the Twin Cities, who works specifically with Hmong couples is the keynote speaker. He told the crowd that the there are no easy answers to solve violence in Hmong marriages. "There are many potential contributions to this complication and so we must take personal responsibility to know where we are and how our self-formation affects the dynamic of the relationship."

Also, he explains that domestic violence is not a part of Hmong history. And while there are more cases occurring now in the United States, "we have to be careful not to say: Is domestic violence so prevalent in the Hmong? Or we have to be careful to deny that it doesn't exist, so we have to make sure we don't stigmatize Hmong are so violent."

In addition to addressing domestic violence in Hmong relationships, he talks about the differences of each generation of Hmong people who live in the United States currently.

1) The Hmong elders -- those born, raised and who lived most of their lives in Southeast Asia. Hmong language and culture is most familiar to them.

2) The middle-aged Hmong -- those born and who lived in Southeast Asia for part of their lives, however may have likely been educated in America and now have jobs. Hmong language and culture is still familiar to them. Most have learned how to speak English.

3) The young Hmong -- those born in America and speak mainly English. Hmong language and culture may be less familiar or unfamiliar at all.

Wednesday on NewsChannel 7, catch the second part of the series where we talk to several couples at the retreat, including one with who were forced to marry at 15 and 16 years old. They'll share with us how their relationship has stood the test of time. 

Also, we'll hear why organizers say this event could save lives and heartache.

If you have any additional questions, please send us your thoughts here at the blog site.